28 harmful tips for aspiring artists
Do you want to become a real artist? Well, the profession you have chosen is difficult, but very interesting!
By following these tips, you are guaranteed to drive the artist inside yourself to suicide. Did you recognize yourself on this list?
1. Draw exclusively on checkered paper! Otherwise, you can get lost, inadvertently, on such a spacious, lonely white sheet without landmarks and guides.
2. In general, the worse the paper, and the fewer sketches, the better – save your money! Moreover, the parents’ money.
3. Start drawing someone exclusively from the eyes … no, from one eye! And from there already lead the line. Or, as a last resort, from the front hoof / other limb … We start cheerfully with the details, and finish with the form – building and drawing the mass is a dangerous heresy. It can make you, scary to say, think in volumes. And in general, think.
4. Never draw sketches on separate sheets – otherwise, God forbid, you will get tired and you will be lazy to paint your work. A sheet of the work itself will be enough … Nothing, the holes from the eraser can be passed off as elements of expressionism.
5. In general, you should try to complete the work on the same day that you started. Think about what pride you will get when you say to some professional artist: “Brake! This is what you paint for three months, I can do in three hours! ” The main thing is not to attach a sample of your art to the application.
6. No, never draw from life! She is boring, fickle and windy – and some organisms in this nature generally have the audacity to move and move … Pump yourself some pictures from the Internet, and that’s all.
7. Experiments are dangerous animals to stay away from. It doesn’t matter if experimenting with technique, style, size, color – this is not for you. As it rolls, so let it always be.
8. You do not need to know exactly where the bones of man and beast are, how muscles are attached to them – are you a doctor? To everyone who does not understand this, explain that it is you “you see it this way” – a streamlined phrase justifying any dislocated limb fracture and other characters’ injuries.
9. If someone criticizes you – tell yourself that this someone simply does not understand art, even if he is an art critic. If an artist criticizes you, then he probably envies you – look, this mediocre one studied at an artist, at an institute – and never reached your dazzling level – you have more friends in VKontakte than he does. It means that you can draw better – people cannot be fooled!
10. Don’t paint backgrounds! Never. You can’t do it anyway, so why try?
11. Each of your sketches, any five-letter picture should be immediately posted on the Internet in order to make all progressive mankind happy with this generous deed – surely there is too much free space in the Internet art galleries waiting for your drawings – everything, to the last. And in general, take quantity, not quality.
12. And also – any educational drawing, be it a still life with a pyramid and a ball of plaster, a dozen noses, copied from a book with exercises – you must certainly share them! You never know that this is not interesting to anyone … But everyone will know what a fine fellow you are – at last you have taken up your studies.
13. The grass is green. Bright, poisonous green. And it has no other shades. The trees have a brown trunk … And the shadows are smeared with black. Every child knows this, so why not send all kinds of color science out there?
14. Whether it is gouache or watercolor, paint it the same way. Here’s another, to be sophisticated and learn different techniques … After all, both are paint, right? So feel free to smear the watercolor in gouache consistency on the paper.
15. Composition – from the evil one! Just listen to how suspicious the word itself sounds, brrr! And from her sheer confusion … Why not again use the explanation here “I see it”?
16. Remember, you don’t draw well because you didn’t get a good tablet. Without expensive tools, electronics, you will not be able to improve! There will be a tablet, and there will be masterpieces. What, traditional? Don’t be silly, this is clearly not for you – there is no “mark” button there.
17. Hands, legs, eyes – it’s such a hassle … So why draw them? Hide your hands in your pockets, your legs with grass, and the other eye under your bangs – and that’s it!
18. As soon as you start drawing and crawl out to the Internet, open up the commissaries. Someone says that you draw badly, and even crooked in places, so what a shame to take for such money? So let him look at point 8. And in general, all these envious professionals do not blather – you all have such a flash mob, period!
19. Draw every day? Painting more than three hours a day? You don’t need it, you have talent. And do not take the opinion of others into account.
20. The best way to learn how to draw is to copy only the work of other artists! Better yet, the only one that you liked on the Deviant Art website. One to one. In the same style. About how harmful nature is, you already know … So let them not bother about plagiarism, dead-end paths, lack of imagination, and so on – dense people who lagged behind progress, what to take from them.
21. Only frayers and show-offers scan! You just have to upload a photo from your phone to the gallery – cheap and cheerful.
22. You don’t need to know the difference between anatomy, technique, and style. Broken limbs are your style! And to anyone who makes you a comment on anatomy, or something like that, answer that this is because of your style, in which this critic does not understand … Divorced, you know, lovers of realism … (No, read about the fact that such realism, while it is not required at all).
23. Demand from all the familiar artists tutorials that would definitely teach you how to draw in one day. Better yet, in one hour. The main thing is fast. And without any hassle. The fact that all artists say that such tutorials, gadgets and other magic wands do not exist in nature – but only hard hard work – this is, for sure, such a worldwide conspiracy directed against you personally. And don’t forget about point 8!
24. You hired yourself a private tutor, and he has the audacity to give you homework? Drawing ?! Where have you seen such things, dismiss the teacher immediately, and find someone who will not poke you, criticize, and make you work!
25. Having mastered one technique, you can no longer learn another – less hassle. Look, for many artists one technique remains the leading and beloved … And the worse you are – you will have it too! The only technique. And why is it needed, this secondary importance …
26. You need to show your sketches and drawings to as many artists as possible, and ask: “Well, how does it work for me?” This will allow you to quickly differentiate them into “bad artists, and“ good ”. Good artists will react like this:“ cool, you cool, I would draw like that! (many exclamation marks). You must be friends with them. Bad artists will be remembered, and they will mutter something about what you can and better. Sometimes you can communicate with them too – they are just shy, and overwhelmed by your magnificence. Try, after all, to ask for a compliment. And very bad artists will say that something is wrong with the anatomy, with the composition, with the perspective … and how to fix it, they will advise you to redo something, talk about the meaning, confidence of the stroke and other dregs … complain, shout at them (along with good artists). You can even ban, but it’s more boring than complaining.
27. As soon as you start drawing a little better, you level-up a couple of times – and then it’s time to rest on your laurels. You don’t need to learn anything else.
28. If, scrupulously following these tips, you never became an artist, then you will be able to say to all the artists who come across your life path: “I also painted before / in my youth and I was an artist / I am also an artist at heart”! And enjoy how artistically the faces of your interlocutors will curve.